First Week

I've been a lot busy. I've only got a good 10 minutes before I have to run again. Works been good. I'm doing a minimum 60 hour week from now but I love every bit of it. The bills have come rolling in again this time of the month and I've got a full on weekend with early cafe shifts and celebratory dinner/drinks with best friends for my new job. We're getting a car this weekend as well and it's all pretty exciting. Lionel's busy at work too but with the car, I can now bring him dinner every night. I'm going to get inked soon. Something I've had always wanted to do regardless of what people say. My drivers test will be delayed as I've got too much work on my hands at the moment. Other than that, things are fine and I'm considering bar tending for Hilton Hotel just for fun. I've got all this silly dreams that I want to do at least once in my life but having not enough hours in a day to complete it all.

Lionel brought me to Eureka Towers just 2 nights ago. The view was spectacular being 88 floors above ground overlooking the whole city of Melbourne. It was rather romantic in a way although I scared the shit outta me self when we went to the glass deck. Anyways, I'll write again. soon. Tonight, like every other night, I've gotta wait for my hubbie to come home from work. I feel so happy day by day. He said to me last night he wanted to marry me. Of course I wanted to, but we're both too young, but having to have someone to share my dreams with me, it's such a wonderful feeling when u have someone u love cuddling you to sleep every night, washing your hair when your hands are full of blisters and plasters and to have it all blow dried nicely,having someone to make my breakfast and lunch boxes for work every morning, having someone to give me my piggy back rides every time my feet hurts from walking.

If you know me, its really unusual for me to talk about a guy this way. But what else can i say, this guy made my heart skip a beat and I'm pretty sure he'll sweep me off my feet for the rest of my life.

More than Happy

I said I was going to write when good news come about. It did. They say things come by in its own time, It's been a good one year working for Commonwealth Bank's Melbourne Operations Head Office, no doubt it was good but there was a lot of insecurity when you are contracted for a period of time and when you have a mortgage to pay. God works in his own ways for each of us, i believe in prayers and a little bit of persistence. I got offered a Full time Permanent Job for the Bank in a different sector as of today. One that surprisingly didn't apply for and got called in personally from a branch I had no idea exist for me to be part of their team. Months and months of sleepless nights all put to an end now. It sounds too good to be true, these feelings are way beyond what I can actually put into words now. I've had everything I ever wanted in my life today.

I count the blessings showered onto my life. I am just very very happy.

This years Xmas presents came early. I love every single one of you who have been there for me. The happiness comes also with a little bit of sadness. Sad because I've made such great friends at work that I've been part of a family with for the past year, that I see almost 40 hours and more a week for the past year, friends I have to now leave for something better.

What is that word to describe it all?

BitterSweet.

Moving on is hard, but exciting at the same time because there are just so many people to meet, just so many things to learn and so many more things to experience. It'll be a good journey. and Thank you for being a part of it.

Time

Last night I cooked dinner for my brother and sister. We had it inside the bedroom where we sleep. It was sorta nasty in a way if you think about it, to have moved the food on our bedside table in front of the laptop with my brother's ingenious idea to watch Prom Night while eating. It also felt nice being able to be in this room and talk to them, laugh about the silly things we do and of course my sibling's most loved topic is how gay and bitchy I am plus the constant talk on criticizing my driving. I'm getting a car soon for myself! Just a little bit more to save up for! Anyway, what I am trying to say is that times like this where I get to spend with my family is really Priceless. My brother just broke off his relationship of 3 years last weekend, it was mutual and perhaps for the better. I never believed in long distance relationships, I will not start in having that little bit of faith in it too.

I had an amazing weekend of party/sisha and of course my time with Lionel. I spend Sunday watching the story of Aryton Senna, an amazing Formula One driver and my weekly marathon of Fast Furious movies. I don't know how boyish I can get with Lionel's influence in me with cars. We hit our 16th movie last weekend as well, from when we starting dating, we've watched one movie a weekend in the cinema on an average count to date. Hoyts must really love us with the amount of money we spend on them.

My package arrived from America this morning. Now I have to plan on how to surprise my boyfriend for the weekend! I can't believe it's only Tuesday! I've had a few interviews in line, hoping only for the best! Stage One for my house has finished and It's all getting pretty exciting now. I've had myself covered for Income Protection which was approved last week. So everything is falling into place quite well and I am happy.

I guess one should always look forward to each day and always be thankful for the wonderful things in life. I know I do! There are days where you just really feel like you can't be fucked with anything anymore, but believe me, other days turn out better. My mom has been feeling a little sad lately being away from us for so long, it got me a little down knowing how I can only be there for here through the phone as I have work commitments. It's been far too long since I've been home. I miss my family.

Anyways this whole week is family week! You take care and I'll tell you if good news come about. xx

Mending the soul

It's been a while since I've actually gone home. I swear my workplace is like my first home because I spend more time working than actually sleeping. Either that, there's always something to do, someone's birthday to attend, some party that can't be avoided. I broke down last night at work. I was beginning to wonder when I would actually fall apart. Have you ever been in situations where you are the sole person doing all the labor while someone else just watches you do it for the next 7 hours? I'm not complaining about work, I love work; mainly because I need the money and because I have to provide for my brother and sister; it's just been hard for me that I wake up at 6.30am and start work at the bank at 8 till 4.30pm and rush straight to my other job til 11pm last night. It would have been better if I hadn't had to do everything myself, well things are always better when someone else helps along.

I looked at my wrinkly wrinkly hands and bruised bruised heels, I couldn't even get into the shower without help last night. My boyfriend walked me a 15 minute walk just watching me tear my way home. He's good that way that he just gives me my time knowing how I hate talking things through with people. I feel sad for him nevertheless because I refuse to share anything intimate with him; by that I mean my feelings and what I go though everyday. I don't know why I close up so much around people, I just feel like time spent is precious and it need not involve anything bad, I just want to share good times and happy moments with people I love.

I am okay..

The bad days are gone and I have this weekend and the next to look forward to. How fast one month has flown, I barely noticed it fly by. It will be a year since I've started at the Bank. I have a special gift for Lionel next week when we'll be celebrating a very special day for both of us. I don't know how to tell you this but having met Lionel, he's been nothing but perfection. I meet new people on an everyday basis, talk to them and all that, that's my job but I can never find anyone even close to the qualities Lionel has.

I am so lucky that I have someone to sing me a bedtime song, to tuck me into bed, to help me steam iron my work clothes, to make my bad days better days, to have stayed up just to pick me up from work and to tell me how amazing a person I am in his eyes. I find it all too good to be true, but it is happening. Lionel has happened in my life.

 I'm well from the cold I caught last week for being constantly under the rain. I have a huge party to attend over the weekend with Lionel and It'll be fun.


I can't wait to dance under the moonlight, I can't wait to be all cuddled in his arms.

Somewhere over the rainbow and the dreams you dreamed of

I'd like to think that dreams do come true. It's been a rather exhausting week for me with work piled up like no tomorrow. I've given some thought about the online site and I've decided to set it up towards the middle of this month, I just purchased a Monster Turbine Pro Copper Gold Ear Phone for the boyfriend and I've been going through this crazy obsession with Yves Saint Laurent arty ovale rings. I just think every girl should own one because it brings such a sophisticated element to one.

Hello there little one! My favourite in turqoise.

 

 Monster Turbine Pro Copper

What else is new? Recently my boyfriend has been into this photo taking phase and we decided to invest in this beauty, yes a Nikon D7000. I must admit that I was a little reluctant in this purchase because I have always been a Canon user and because it was really for professional use for amateurs like us.I've grown to love it over time although it drives us crazy most of the time with its very complicated settings.

Baby Nikon!

This week will be rather lonesome as I will be focusing on work.My brother's basketball team won Champion in the Asean Games yesterday in Melbourne. I had my driving lesson as well and my hazard test is in a weeks time! I think I am Lionel deprived.. he sent me a text saying that if he didn't get to see me before Friday next week he'll be hospitalized for lack of Karenloveism.

Have a good week bros!

Weekend Blues

It feels different lying on this bed with the same familiar scent of this room. The laptop is watching my brother sleep and my sister is snoring away, snuggled right up beside me. I've had a bad cough and a sore throat to keep me tucked in bed for the weekend. I'm looking at this picture of you and I. I can't sleep tonight  because you're not here to kiss me good night.

and She says to him..

Some people think it's easy just to forget, I just want to tell you that It isn't and I haven't forgotten about you. I know It's like how the song is sung, about how one mustn't make excuses for another's behaviour. I think about you every night that you are there and I wonder about how you are; because it is important to me that you are okay. I also want to believe that you are doing well without me and that you find happiness that you ever so deserve. I can't breathe. I want to tell you I miss you but I know we can never be friends again. I don't remember why I stopped talking to you, I don't remember why I gave up on you.